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Thesis Statements Across the Grade Levels

Page history last edited by gretchen 10 years, 2 months ago

Sample Thesis Statements


  • English I - "Main Idea" thesis, simple list thesis

    • In Elizabethan England, there are many ways chivalry is evident.
  • English II - List thesis with tension word, focus on using prompt to dictate structure; *honors instruction at this level eliminates the list structure as much as possible

    • Although the Elizabethan English society seemed to be primitive and unstructured, chivalry was revealed by ___________________, ____________________, and _______________.
    • *Surrounded by the growing fear of the beast, Jack uses his instinct to manipulate and oppress the other boys as he fights to gain dominance. 
    • *To find true identity, the hero must face the consequences of indulging temptation in order to accept the darkest part, or shadow, of his being.
  • English III - Work on eliminating the list -- more complex stucture, keep tension word/make the point arguable by acknowledging both sides

    • Although chivalry was alive in Elizabethan England, in 21st century America, chivalry is dead.
  • English IV - Complex structure, thesis may be moved around, multiple sentence thesis, thesis may look more like an introductory paragraph

    • Upon Hamlet's return home, his chivalrous drive leads him not to challenge his uncle for Hamlet's father's death.  It is this drive that leads to Hamlet's and his family's ultimate demise.


**Prompt dictates thesis, thesis dictates structure**




Developing a Thesis


Think of yourself as a member of a jury, listening to a lawyer who is presenting an opening argument. You'll want to know very soon whether the lawyer believes the accused to be guilty or not guilty, and how the lawyer plans to convince you. Readers of academic essays are like jury members: before they have read too far, they want to know what the essay argues as well as how the writer plans to make the argument. After reading your thesis statement, the reader should think, "This essay is going to try to convince me of something. I'm not convinced yet, but I'm interested to see how I might be."


An effective thesis cannot be answered with a simple "yes" or "no." A thesis is not a topic; nor is it a fact; nor is it an opinion. "Reasons for the fall of communism" is a topic. "Communism collapsed in Eastern Europe" is a fact known by educated people. "The fall of communism is the best thing that ever happened in Europe" is an opinion. (Superlatives like "the best" almost always lead to trouble. It's impossible to weigh every "thing" that ever happened in Europe. And what about the fall of Hitler? Couldn't that be "the best thing"?)


A good thesis has two parts. It should tell what you plan to argue, and it should "telegraph" how you plan to argue—that is, what particular support for your claim is going where in your essay.


Steps in Constructing a Thesis


First, analyze your primary sources. Look for tension, interest, ambiguity, controversy, and/or complication. Does the author contradict himself or herself? Is a point made and later reversed? What are the deeper implications of the author's argument? Figuring out the why to one or more of these questions, or to related questions, will put you on the path to developing a working thesis. (Without the why, you probably have only come up with an observation—that there are, for instance, many different metaphors in such-and-such a poem—which is not a thesis.)


Once you have a working thesis, write it down. There is nothing as frustrating as hitting on a great idea for a thesis, then forgetting it when you lose concentration. And by writing down your thesis you will be forced to think of it clearly, logically, and concisely. You probably will not be able to write out a final-draft version of your thesis the first time you try, but you'll get yourself on the right track by writing down what you have.


Keep your thesis prominent in your introduction. A good, standard place for your thesis statement is at the end of an introductory paragraph, especially in shorter (5-15 page) essays. Readers are used to finding theses there, so they automatically pay more attention when they read the last sentence of your introduction. Although this is not required in all academic essays, it is a good rule of thumb.


Anticipate the counter-arguments. Once you have a working thesis, you should think about what might be said against it. This will help you to refine your thesis, and it will also make you think of the arguments that you'll need to refute later on in your essay. (Every argument has a counter-argument. If yours doesn't, then it's not an argument—it may be a fact, or an opinion, but it is not an argument.)


Michael Dukakis lost the 1988 presidential election because he failed to campaign vigorously after the Democratic National Convention.


This statement is on its way to being a thesis. However, it is too easy to imagine possible counter- arguments. For example, a political observer might believe that Dukakis lost because he suffered from a "soft-on-crime" image. If you complicate your thesis by anticipating the counter-argument, you'll strengthen your argument, as shown in the sentence below.


While Dukakis' "soft-on-crime" image hurt his chances in the 1988 election, his failure to campaign vigorously after the Democratic National Convention bore a greater responsibility for his defeat.


Some Caveats and Some Examples


A thesis is never a question. Readers of academic essays expect to have questions discussed, explored, or even answered. A question ("Why did communism collapse in Eastern Europe?") is not an argument, and without an argument, a thesis is dead in the water.


A thesis is never a list. "For political, economic, social and cultural reasons, communism collapsed in Eastern Europe" does a good job of "telegraphing" the reader what to expect in the essay—a section about political reasons, a section about economic reasons, a section about social reasons, and a section about cultural reasons. However, political, economic, social and cultural reasons are pretty much the only possible reasons why communism could collapse. This sentence lacks tension and doesn't advance an argument. Everyone knows that politics, economics, and culture are important.


A thesis should never be vague, combative or confrontational. An ineffective thesis would be, "Communism collapsed in Eastern Europe because communism is evil." This is hard to argue (evil from whose perspective? what does evil mean?) and it is likely to mark you as moralistic and judgmental rather than rational and thorough. It also may spark a defensive reaction from readers sympathetic to communism. If readers strongly disagree with you right off the bat, they may stop reading.


An effective thesis has a definable, arguable claim. "While cultural forces contributed to the collapse of communism in Eastern Europe, the disintegration of economies played the key role in driving its decline" is an effective thesis sentence that "telegraphs," so that the reader expects the essay to have a section about cultural forces and another about the disintegration of economies. This thesis makes a definite, arguable claim: that the disintegration of economies played a more important role than cultural forces in defeating communism in Eastern Europe. The reader would react to this statement by thinking, "Perhaps what the author says is true, but I am not convinced. I want to read further to see how the author argues this claim."


A thesis should be as clear and specific as possible. Avoid overused, general terms and abstractions. For example, "Communism collapsed in Eastern Europe because of the ruling elite's inability to address the economic concerns of the people" is more powerful than "Communism collapsed due to societal discontent."

Copyright 1999, Maxine Rodburg and The Tutors of the Writing Center at Harvard University



  • http://www.fas.harvard.edu/~wricntr/documents/Thesis.html
  • a group of about 11 HHS English teachers hammered out the grade level thesis directions and statements at an informal meeting in the Fall of '08. For more information, contact Greg Wald, Matt Brophy, Jackie Cross, Jill VanAlstyne, Jean O'Connor, Marianne Schadt, Becky Krantz, Randy Hussey, Margaret Belisle, Hanna Carey, or Gretchen Edelen

Additional Resources

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Comments (2)

Don Pogreba said

at 4:59 pm on Mar 1, 2009

We should probably deal with the two thesis statement pages. Combine them?

gretchen said

at 5:54 pm on Mar 1, 2009

Sure we could combine them. Good idea. We would need to find a way to signal, probably with a new title, that the sample thesis progression is a part of the material of the page. I think it's convenient to have all the thesis material on one page for access. G

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